Star I wanna give you an honest advice that you're probably not gonna get anytime soon by anyone else here.
You are shit at this game and no matter how hard you try, you will never be good. No matter how hard you try, you're not going to get any better and you've been seeing this all the time. Just drop this game and play a game where you have no bad reputation in and don't expect to be terrible at either. This is the best mindset to have and it only comes from playing a new and different game which means drop BB and step your GG game up. If you do, there is a high chance that you will naturally get good at BB. If not, this is not the game for you.