Renvalt

Before anything else, I'd like to apologize for my words and actions (or what could pass for "actions" anyways). I was extremely frustrated from last night when, after losing constantly and realizing how much of a bloody button masher I was, I felt I wasn't improving. I really lost myself in the delusion of the situation, and I should have known better. It was my fault for all the things that happened, including starting this topic to rant. I hope you'll forgive me for this, but if you don't, at least I apologized, so I'm satisfied with that.

What reason would you have to think I'm a troll? I'm always called a troll, and all my forum accounts are called "troll accounts", but in reality I can't tell if I'm trolling or not - because I don't know how to troll. I don't know what "trolling" is. I have no reason to lie, but I'm just.... full of questions I wish I knew the answers to. But if it makes you feel better, then just ban me. Rid this forum of my presence if you're that tired of me. I would delete this post myself, but I don't know if that would just be running away from what I've done and said, or if it would be doing the community a favor. I don't know what to do anymore, goddammit. So just lock this thread. Delete it too, if you want. I've got something to figure out now. Hopefully I can find out how to "lighten up" as you so want me to, because I can't seem to please you the way things are now. I'm leaving. Goodbye.

Replies in bold. I apologize in advance for any political, religious, or bigoted rhetoric I may have included, if there was any at all.

Answers in bold.

Each time I play BlazBlue, I do okay. It's not enough though. Not for me. But I know that at my current level, I'm still in Scrub's Hell. I can't get out of it atm. Earlier today, I was at Tyler(Homura's) house and we were playing GGX2:AC. I left around 5 PM PST, but during that I had shown some serious lack of skill progress. It was as if I was watching my skills shrink instead of grow. I was going to give into a suggestion made much earlier in my FG community life to get SSF4AE, but I don't want to ditch BlazBlue. Yet at the moment, I feel I'm not ready for BlazBlue's ADVANCED mechanics. I feel I don't understand 2D Fighters enough to really get any better than I am. I feel like I've hit a limit, and that in order to break the seal on said limit, I'll need to play SSF4AE to get the knowledge necessary. But... once I return to BlazBlue, I fear the "Hadouken spamming, Shoryuken trolling" of Ryu will follow me back. And I really don't want that. For me, BlazBlue was my first TRUE genuine FG, and I want to get better at it. But I feel as if not having certain pieces of knowledge are keeping me from evolving my gameplay. Anyone have any idea if I can still keep at BlazBlue and manage to take the alternate route to Fighter's Haven? Or should I join the ranks of "The Shotokan Scrubs" to make it there?

I'd love to attend this one, but I've got some serious fundamentals work to do before I return to Danisen, no, not just Danisen but netplay too. I'd explain, but the details would more than likely bore you. So I'll just leave this here for now. Have fun - don't get all salty.

I've been using it. It's a matter of the muscle memory, as you call it. I'd have to practice consistently every day until I can get it down, that's kinda how bad my way with that input is. Not so much with 236 or 214, but 623 is an input that has plagued me for nearly my entire life. Even after I could use the Hadouken consistently when I learned it about 12 years ago, I've always had issues with the Shoryuken type moves. Recently, the Rekka style became easier for me, yet those 623s are a BITCH for me. So that's kinda what I'm dealing with - I'd have to really, seriously, beat this inability to do 623 out me me. That's how bad I am with it.

In other words, grinding it out for a few hours every day. Even if I can do it 10 times in a row, it serves no point if I can't do those same 10 reps constantly without failures in-between. Which is what's happening. I get those 10 reps, but they come in between a crapload of attempts which fall short of the 10 needed to really be "consistent". So in reality, when you say 10 you really mean like 30 or 50, or even one hundred. I shouldn't be able to bork the input at all, except for really rare circumstances. ESPECIALLY in a combo. That's the answer I'm seeing - that I need near flawless execution of something as basic as that. Not entirely flawless, but as damn near possible as I can get. It doesn't. It's an instinctual mental suggestion that it's supposed to work, apparently. Because apparently my mind is saying "If I can see where I'm going wrong, perhaps I can fix it". Of course, this usually ends up making things worse, since my execution is so bad that I can't even do it without relying on my vision, and even then I can't do it perfectly (looking at my pad and noticing the so-called "speed", as well as listening to voice cues, can somewhat help). But yeah, you're right in that it doesn't help, but I guess it's one of those habitual crutches I happen to have, and that I need to get rid of. Stat.

I know I'm afraid and shouldn't be. But what am I so afraid of? I feel like there's nothing to fear, and yet there it is - I'm frightened. Btw, this usually also happens in Practice Mode as well - specifically in Challenge Mode. And it most DEFINITELY happens with my Inferno Dividers - no matter the character, I can't get them off because my doing them so fast (or slow, depending on how you look at it) causes it to come out as 636 (and in quite a few cases, 6376 or 6396). That's why I have to look at the controller - I fear I'll actually press a jump instead of doing the 623 motion cleanly.

I know his inputs are pretty lax, yet for some reason I feel like complaining about it. I just... grrr.... can't do it. I have no idea what the goddamn psychology is behind your mind forcing you to speed up your execution of inputs - I have no idea why it happens. There are a bunch of theories I've discovered, but none that I could say are certain. Meh, what the hell. I'll play Ragna. Just to give myself some peace of mind.

Sengart seems to have the same problem I do. If something comes out super fast, my body matches my execution speed to what I see, and oftentimes that means I screw up inputs. Basically, if a character is coming at me fast, my body will instinctively react with the same amount of speed when doing inputs. I have no friggin clue WHY it happens, but it's a matter of HOW not to get it to happen. Lax-execution characters for me aren't exactly the best thing, since the harder a character's execution is, the better off it will be for me (since brutal punishment via difficulty in video games has been known to make some things seem much easier - or so I'm told). However, for me, the issue is I cannot find a character I want to make my main. I can just look and look, and in the end, I can't ever pick a main. I play and look, play and look - yet nothing comes out of it. Is this a psychological issue that needs fixing, or is there something else I can't discern? Bear in mind that I've never really played with human opponents much to really know matchups and stuff, since I spent like 90% of my life in combat with a CPU that never really did much. But that's kinda off-topic. I want to learn, but mentally I'm in a slump.

But cry I did. I can't change the past. But at the same time, the rules are written where if everyone DOES hit 3rd dan, I've got nobody to fight, and thus could be banished from the league on ranking alone. Not because I was cheating or anything, but because I so genuinely suck at this game that everyone rank farmed me to 3rd Dan.

Urgh. Keep reminding me that I'm still at Kyu, why don'tcha? Bad enough that I lost most of my fights, but to end the night as the lowest ranked of my division - it felt so bad, I actually cried. If this keeps up, I think I may run out of opponents for the Danisen. In which case I'd have to forfeit any new chances to participate.

Fine by me. See ya Friday!

That's why I asked. I didn't want there to be a confusion with my name on there twice. I knew I was Kyu, hence why I asked - I just didn't know exactly how things worked.

I switched up my PSN ID and my character, so I'll be coming in with a clean slate. In exchange, I'd like to request that renvalt32 be purged from the rankings. Otherwise, everything's pretty much the same. New PSN ID: RenvaltEX Character: Jin Let's hope for good WC turn out.

Yeah, I was gonna say, if the OP was done here, I'd rather decide to give them their post back, as I'm done with my issue.

Says the one who can't stand Sicilian awesomeness. And besides, I don't eat cheesecake anyways - I eat pizza, and what kind of screwy rodent eats their pizza without mozzarella cheese? And hey, if my mom can do it, so can I. My mom ain't exactly aiming for our niche, though, so maybe that's what makes it easier for her - she doesn't have to appeal to a high expectations group.

Cheese, you say?! It better be Mozarella! That's the only kind of cheese worth eating IMHO. @Airk - When they say "contribute to society" usually the first thing to flash across my mind is "an honest, paying job so you can fund the world war machine make a living like any other person. In other words, they've told me to focus on a career. Which I have (or have plans to pursue), but it's a career that involves video gaming. I mean, if my mom can have a career in that, why can't I? Furthermore, it's not one I'm essentially good at. I tried to take the ZUN/Ishiwatari route, but failed dismally. I'm not beneath taking help on that, but everyone's tried to gouge me for money I don't have, or have outright said they may ditch the project. This of course hampers my self esteem in regards to creating game ideas (I'm good at fusion of different elements - one of the perks of being in love with gaming as I am). I'm working on the whole "volunteer" deal, but.... let's just say there are some "issues" that need dealing with before I can confidently walk in and start. EDIT - Also, I'd like to apologize to the OP for stealing their thread. Please have some complimentary cat neck on the house.

Replies in bold. Please note I mean no harm, I just have a hard time typing/talking when under emotional curtain fire from a certain part of me. So, don't take anything that looks like those past shenanigans seriously in the future, okay? Odds are, if you notice and pretend it's just me screwing around, odds are I'll get the hint and stop (if I don't do so before you figure it out).

I have. They told me the same thing they've been telling me since I was 6 (I'm 24 now) - stop playing video games and do something beneficial to society (what that "something beneficial" is, I dunno yet). Now, I would just like to add something here - generally when I'm doing randoms, the stress of losing is a lot more prevalent and sometimes stays that way. But if I'm just, say, screwin' around, and chatting and having a gay ol' time with my opponents, then it's not so bad. I kinda need that verbal communication from the other side that they're having fun too (and not the sarcastic, dickish kind of verbal confirmation). In other words, I don't need you telling me how I must play BlazBlue - that's for me to do. You can give me tips and such on gameplay, but don't go DEMANDING I follow it, just let me take the advice or not. Also, about the EVO/NWM shtick I did earlier, I'd like to follow up on that: The reason I whined so much about that particular issue is I've never been to one of those kinds of events. So that was a mere jealous rage at everyone else who CAN go, and who WILL be going to NWM this year. I just found out about it - it's not like I could scrape $150+ for the ability to get over to be there. I'd rather invest that money in a high quality stick. That way, if and WHEN I decide to go to a NWM or EVO gathering, I won't look like the uninitiated tourist - besides, I'd want to at least take part in one of the comps, not caring how far I got but rather that I did it. And of course, since I don't know what control types are the majority over there, I'd rather go in with a loud boom as the door went down (okay, okay, I'm exaggerating and being a bit overdramatic, sue me and feed me to the snarfkins). Long story short: I at least want to "appear" to others like I'm taking my interest in this game seriously. But at the same time, I want to have fun doing it. My question is: How do you gain the balance between the two, and still not mess up being who you are as a person? I'm constantly asking anyone possible, even myself as I play, well, amongst myself. Note: The use of "appear" is largely in the eye of the beholder. Take it as you see fit.

Okay, Lord Pwnge hit it right on the money. Well, at least one of the reasons why I play FGs, anyways. Also, I'd like to apologize for my previous words and actions - I meant none of them. To be brutally honest, I do enjoy playing the game (emphasis on playing), but I do have this backmind worry that players will leave if I'm on a constant loss streak. It happened with the games on GGPO, and I do worry it'll happen here. But if I COULD play for endless amounts (meaning I had the stamina and the mental endurance to do so), I would. A)Either people leave when they realize they're dealing with a complete scrub. B)I tend to burn out, but not for reasons of being pissy at losing - I just happen to get an urge to do something else. Those two are usually what happen, at least from what I notice when I'm thinking with a clear head (Path B always happens when I'm with other human beings in the flesh). But yeah, if I could just, y'know, dick around and be friendly and casual, I'd do that.

@Katz - The difference is that you HAVE people you can meet in the flesh. I've only got one, and while he may not have BlazBlue, at the very least he's got a game I enjoy playing. The problem is that he has a life (as well as I), and we can't, y'know, spend 7 days a week gaming. @Circulous - And thus why I dislike my anger: those three sentences were all so jumbled as I tried to calm down (or got even angrier, I forget which it was), that I couldn't tell which of them was truly me speaking, and not my anger. But if you want me to quit gaming, you're basically asking me to get rid of the only pleasure activity I know that sustains my will to live - if I give that up, I'll pretty much either A)Beat the shit out of anyone I see (even the cops; no, ESPECIALLY the cops), or B)jump off the nearest bridge. In other words, my life's so fucked up that I don't consider myself as having anything worth living for, other than gaming. There, that's your answer.

Of course I'm playing with my goddamn pride on the line! Winning means more friends, which means more consistent opportunities to keep my skills sharp. And believe me, I say "good game", but that's only because I'm forcing myself to be a good sport. Were I to say what I truly wanted to say, I'd be throwing racist name calling all over the place. But y'know, I have a conscience, and that conscience tells me to be nice, even if my emotions don't want me to be. Again, you think I like being angry when I lose? One thing's for sure, though - I must like the game enough to keep coming back, I doubt I'll ever trade it in. Perhaps I'm that much of a masochist to keep beating myself up in hopes that a certain PART of me leaves my friggin body, or at least starts obeying me.

How, then, do you look at a constant stream of losses - where the matchup is quite in your opponents favor - in a positive limelight and STILL somehow manage to keep your sanity? I can literally feel the pain of MY losses, it's like someone's stamping their foot on my back, trying to make me kneel in humiliation. I know I shouldn't be feeling any sort of heavy levels of emotions when I lose, but I've literally tried all I know to suppress and get through sessions without feeling any sort of emotional overload, and I've just.... well, failed miserably. I hide it in order to not be seen as a emo child - because from what I've seen, nobody likes it when you whine and go all "drama queen" on people. Hell, I should just be saying "Good games" where applicable, right? That's really what people expect to hear. But when I'm losing non-stop, and my combo patterns are getting wrecked because the stress of my situation forces my muscle memory to unravel and vanish, then what do you suppose I do when I've exhausted all my mental self-therapy options that other "shitty ass therapists" have suggested?